Today I am posting as part of the Golden Sky Blogfest tto help fellow author and blogger, E.C. Stilson celebrate the release of her book, The Golden Sky. It officially releases tomorrow!
The Golden Sky is a heartlfelt memoir written in journal format and allows us to see through the eyes of a mother who goes through something many of us can only imagine - the loss of a child. In E.C.'s case it was the loss of a son named Zeke.
In celebration of the books release and in honor of Zeke - E.C. has asked a few of us bloggers to tell about a loss that we have experienced. I must say that E.C. is an incredibly courageous and strong woman to write about something so personal. While I do not pretend to know how difficult it is to lose a child, I do know something about loss. I myself have experienced loss in my life - as a young child.
Faced with this blank page I realize how incredible it is that E.C. was able to write a book and share that part of herself and her life. I really think that it will help people who have suffered some kind of loss themselves. Today, I am talking about something that I don't normally talk about, something that I usually hold close to the chest. It's something I don't try to hide it's just personal. It's a glimpse of me that you haven't seen before - a glimpse that is frankly diffucult to give.
When I was eleven years old my father died of Hodgkins Lymphoma Disease - in short - cancer. This kind of cancer is something that about 90% of patients can over come (don't quote me on that statistic) and he fought a good, hard fight (he was diagnosed when I was about 2 years old) but eventually the disease won. It was a difficult thing as a child to watch someone that you loved and looked up to slowly deteriorate. I do consider myself fortunate because he lived long enough that I am able to remember him and have those memories.
Having experienced that loss so young I will say that I'm not sure I fully understood the impact it would have on me. As an eleven year old I understood what death meant. I knew I would never see him again. I knew that I missed him. But now that I am an adult I understand that his loss is felt still. I think about him often, like when I got married and he wasn't there. When I had my two children that he would never meet and lately when I recieved a publishing contract and have 3 books coming out during the next two months. I got my creativity from him. He was very talented at drawing - in fact - when I was a child I loved Roger Rabbit. LOL. He drew a picture of him and wrote 'love daddy' on it. My husband had it framed a few years ago for me and it hangs in my house to this day. Everytime my children draw something beautiful and I tell them that they are artitsts they say "yeah, just like granpa."
I DO believe that he is watching and that he sees everything that I do. I believe he look as after my children as their gaurdian angel and I believe that he is with me still - but I think anyone who has lost someone would agree - it would be nice to see them and hear them say that they are proud.
He would have been 50 this year - on halloween - to be exact.... (maybe thats why I like werewolves so much....*wags eyebrows*) and I remember him with fondness - even though he was known to be stubborn. (another trait I think I might have gotten....) He loved any kind of candy and dessert especially Rolos and Root Beer Floats (well any kind of ice cream). He had blue eyes and very dark hair - that was very curly (just like my daughter) and he had a smile that people were very drawn too. He had a lot of friends and drove a Harley. (Yes, I rode it too... I had my own helmet it was blue sparkles.) When the gas needle in the car went to empty he would say "We can go for twenty more miles!" Sometimes he was right..... sometimes he ended up pushing while I steered to the nearest gas station. LOL.
His name was Edward Bryan Witt and though his loss was a very long time ago - about 19 years - I won't forget him.
So that's the glimpse into the side of me you don't really get to see - and probably won't see much more in posts to come.. Once again I hand it to E.C. Stilson for sharing her experience. It must not have been easy - perhaps it was healing. But I also think that its a wonderful tribute to a child that was taken too soon..... but you know the saying..... "Only the good die young". That is a saying that I think might be true.
So remember to pick up a copy of The Golden Sky tomorrow to get a glimpse into the heart of a very strong woman. Its an experience that will probably stay with you.
Coming tomorrow to The Unlocked Diary -- Release Day for Before!!!! Don't forget to stop by and enter to win one of the two prize packs that I am giving away.... tomorrow is the last day to enter! (you can enter today in the comment section of the post below this one) I will announce the winners tomorrow afternoon. I am also debuting the Masquerade Trailer and sharing a SUPER fabulous review that a reviewer wrote for Before..... please stop by and helo me celebrate my very first release!
Have a wonderful day everyone!
2 weeks ago